WILD CHILD: Assessing Risky Play

Is it safe? Do you think I can let my child do that?

We hear these questions every week at Wild Child. The best judge of what your child can handle is you–you know your child.

Here are the questions I ask myself when my children are in uncertain situations where I feel my stomach clench:

• Are they likely to get seriously or permanently hurt?

• Do I have the ability to support them if the worst happens?

• What am I most concerned about?

Sometimes explicitly thinking about the concern makes it easier to assess the situation.

Here is my example of where I initially said “no” but changed my mind. My preschooler asked to climb across a log lying about 3 ft over shallow, rocky, moving water on a chilly spring day.

He probably wouldn’t be seriously hurt, but he could hit his head if he fell wrong.  It’s not a high fall, and I know he grabs things with his hands when he falls, so he is unlikely to hit his head.
I was with a friend. If he fell in, I could clamber down the bank and help him out of the water while the friend watched my toddler. I had a first aid kit, and there were spare clothes in the car.
I was most concerned about wet cold children getting hypothermia.

Upon consideration, I realized that my initial reaction of ”no, it’s too dangerous”, was actually because of my concern about getting cold, not serious injury. Once I realized that and recognized that a warm car and dry clothes were only a short walk away, I was able to let him try the adventure with less stress.

He loved it, I was impressed with his climbing ability, and we all went home with a story to tell.

Written by Tandy Morton, Wild Child Playgroup Facilitator